Mum: I thought you and her were bestfriends, I haven't seen her in a while?
Me: Well she turned into a cunt
One Direction: you're insecure don't know what for
Me: do you want a list
Hey darling! Yes, you! Stop scrolling. I want to...
friend: i miss my boyfriend
me: so do i
friend: he calls me princess
me: he calls me fan
me: sometimes fans like plural
me: so he'll be like "I love my fans!" and I'm like I love you too boo.
Reblog if you lick or bite your lips, a lot.
It's easy to find out what had happened, but it's...
romeo: hey i just met you.
romeo: and this is crazy.
romeo: but i saw you at your dad's party that i wasn't supposed to attend and i thought you were pretty cute so i followed you and we kissed but then your nanny called you away and i found out you were a capulet and got bummed so i sneaked into your back yard in the middle of the night and climbed your balcony uninvited to profess my undying love after an hour even though i wanted to bone rosaline like two scenes ago.
romeo: so marry me maybe.
me: I AM A STRONG BLACK WOMAN WHO DON'T NEED NO MAN
real life friends: ...the fuck you smoking
parents: but sweetheart you're asian
tumblr friends: BBY DATS RIGHT U GO TYRONE U GO